invane My personal opinion is that the concept and structure of your song are really fun, but the mix itself needs more work.
As other have pointed out, the reverb is a bit too much. Try to find ways to make it sound distant and ambient without using (as much) reverb.
Additionally, it sounds a bit crunchy due to everything being very loud.Try to turn down the master volume until everything is properly mixed, so the song hits hard because of the quality of your sounds, instead of the volume.
Keep making stuff, and you'll get there!